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Fuzzy.

(4 minute read.)

Entrepreneur? Ha!

'Just a simple guy, I live from day-to-day…'

Self-esteem (whether I appreciate and value myself) and self-confidence (belief in myself and my abilities) have never been strong points of mine, and that I'm not particularly 'dynamic, focused, ambitious, assertive, money-oriented' is something about which I'm still more than a little uncomfortable, but am learning to live with.

I'm no fan of business, and particularly not the dull and/or unethical manner in which much of business-as-usual is undertaken (about which I have many contrarian views and am frequently iconoclastic).

I'm active in it solely because, despite lacking some of the more mercenary traits (as in 'primarily concerned with making money at the expense of ethics'), the requisite talent and experience I have enables me to earn decent money (and which I do without the all-too-common deception and exploitative behaviour).

Had I been sensible, I'd likely have continued my law studies and used them appropriately in an alternate career*.

I've often wished I did (though the orthodoxy and regularity likely wouldn't have suited me)… or had been guitarist in the E Street Band (in their prime).

*[Perhaps an effective antidote to ideas I might once have had in my teen years of life as a bank robber. (Yes, really.)]

Silly though it may sound, I really am into 'doing business naturally and honorably'… favouring generosity and respect over selfishness and exploitation.

I'm a willing exile, a renegade, from the 'men in neckties' brigade… and eschew the usual hustle-hustle-hype 'leaders in our field' shenanigans.

Choosing to do things in an informal, relaxed, and non-pushy way… I'm not a rough'n'tough 'un. Relatively, probably a bit of a sissy.

That 'sleep-is-for-the-weak, respect-only-force, struttin'-around-like-Captain-Invincible horse-in-my-shorts testosterone-overload alpha-male-macho-bullshit-trip' nonsense is anathema to me.

If you're one of those powerhouse-types we're probably not right for each other.

So yeah… 'i am meek and warm and soft to the touch'.

Castaneda readers might suggest this a natural part of the 'warrior's battle against self-importance of the ego'. Others may simply consider it stupidity.

Whatever. Idealistic nonsense though it may be, I'm simply suggesting 'modest and self-effacing' is a viable alternative to the 'be powerful and dominant' ethos… and that 'gentleness and respect, not might' is, to me, a far better way of conducting my activities.

Perhaps paradoxically, and wanting to be honest rather than arrogant… I retain the ability to be coldly ruthless—so please don't mistake gentleness for weakness, or lack of desire for inability.

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