Viewing: Notes » ...into wholeness.
...into wholeness.
(5 minute read.)
This. That. The other.
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It's past four in the morning, and having been thinking when I should be sleeping, I'm going to write a journal note and probably publish it in daylight when I'm awake.
Here we go…
I like sit-reps—they're important chances to appraise and re-appraise.
Ok, so where am I…?
It's important to be honest with myself.
Although there's some projects I want to do, overall I prefer not to do business stuff. But I have to work—I need the money.
In dealing with health issues (cancer and prolonged repeated burnout) and trying to be retired, it's been a handful of years now since I was 'properly' active in business. (I've continued to do some minor stuff.)
And in the years immediately before that, with some significant marriage issues which reduced my ability to do business, I wasn't exactly hitting the high spots.
So to some considerable degree, I'm uneasy about returning to business and my chances of success. Yes I've got good projects, and I also know what to do, but I don't feel at all confident.
During the past couple of years, I've set about easing myself back in… not in a hurry, deciding what I want to do and how I want to do it.
I also thought I was ready (recovered from burnout) to relaunch myself, and subsequently discovered I clearly wasn't—and so withdrew again.
In no way attention-seeking, I won't understate the issue… the effects of which have been significant and continue.
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It's important for me to write and publicly publish this. Doing so will help me to better understand and accept, rather than continue to reduce my self-confidence and self-esteem because I often can't do things in the way I expect to be able to do them.
Prolonged, repeated burnout is a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion, with various consequences. It can significantly impact the brain, affecting areas including the prefrontal cortex responsible for decision-making and emotional regulation.
Emotional: Exhaustion, cynicism, detachment, loss of motivation, feelings of helplessness, and a negative outlook.
Physical: Chronic fatigue, sleep disturbances, headaches, muscle pain, gastro-intestinal problems, and increased susceptibility to illness.
Behavioral: Withdrawal from responsibilities, using unhealthy coping mechanisms (like over-eating or substance use), social isolation, and procrastination.
Potential recovery requires prioritizing rest and self-care.
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Now, although still to some degree still struggling with burnout, and with continuing considerable depletion of self-confidence and -esteem, I'm ready to have a proper go at returning to significant business activity.
Earlier, I got carried away in trying to decide what I really wanted to do, and consequently have a ridiculous number of projects… too many to sensibly do and so I've jettisoned some.
And the others?
Well… I still have too many, but as they're all 'delivering information digitally' and with considerable crossovers in strategy and activity, I should be able to 'get away with it'… by pivoting some into producing books rather than ongoing websites, progressively introducing them over the next 2-3 years, outsourcing 'almost everything' and with extensive use of AI.
Fortunately, start-up costs are next to nothing. I don't have a lot of money, just a small amount of savings, from which I put probably £1k into domain and other initial costs.
I'll begin with a couple of projects which are relatively straightforward and should produce reasonably speedy profit which I can use to begin other projects and then repeat the process of 'funding the next one from the previous one'.
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